Men, Is This You?
Men, Is This You?
Information for Men
Do you want to change?
Violence is learned behavior. You can also learn non-controlling, non-abusive behavior. At Common Purpose we ask you to examine your beliefs – we ask to you look at the following:
- What are the negative effects of your violence and abuse on your partner?
- On your children? On you?
- What is the intent of your violence and abuse?
- What are you trying to make happen
- Why do you want to control your partner?
- Have you hurt your partner? Your children? Yourself?
- Are you afraid you will hurt your partner? Your children? Yourself?
- Do you feel guilty?
- Can you be accountable for your violence and abuse?
- Did you witness violence and abuse in your life?
- Are you tired of the cycle of abuse in your family?
- Are you always promising to change – and then becoming violent again?
How Can You Change?
At Common Purpose your first task will be to develop a safety plan: Your safety plan can include understanding or observing the following:
- When and how you are angry
- Alternatives to negative impulses
- What is a time-out?
- When should you take a time out?
- What is denial, minimizing and victim – blaming?
- Your other tasks will be to:
- Examine your violence and abuse and see how it affects others.
- Examine your beliefs about your abuse – how do you justify your violence and abuse
- Make a short and long-term plan for change
- Speak about your abusive behavior
- Most important… you cannot be violent during the course of the Common Purpose program.
Call Common Purpose at 617-522-6500 for information about abuse prevention programs. Referrals and resources for you and your children are also available.
We’re here to help.
Who can join the group?
Common Purpose groups are open to volunteers, Department of Social Service referred clients, and court-mandated clients.
